Kitty’s Place

Blargh!

Sad news in the morning.

This has made me sad.

I have added a few more pictures. These are of all of us (except the cats). I added one of our computer area in the living room, since that is where I am when I post here. They are here. *smile*

Today is one of those mope about days. The kidlet still has this nagging middle of the night cough. He is fine in the day and has no fever, so what is with the cough? I am so afraid it is going to be asthma, since we both have it to some degree. I take inhalers again after 5 years free of them and his dad is no longer taking inhalers but has needed to in the past. We have an appointment with the doctor for Monday morning.

This is day two with a migraine. It didn’t help that yesterday the kidlet knocked over the new picture printer and it now needs repairing. I knew his father would be upset about it and he was. Of course it was my fault for leaving it in a bad spot and I got the growls about it. Repeat growls came when I woke up from falling asleep while settling the kidlet and said kidlet woke with another coughing spell. Those were for not making the doctor appointment yesterday. Normally I don’t get too upset when he growls, I know it is just his way of being concerned, but when I have spent the day in pain and throwing up, growls are not appreciated.

Had an email from my brother. They are going to take dinner in and share it my grandparents tonight. This is such a tough time for them and everyone is trying to be extra caring and supportive. I so much want to be there but it isn’t possible, so I fret here. My niece turned 16 on Monday. It is so hard to believe she is old enough to get her license already. My sister’s daughter will turn 16 next month. It seems no time since those two were little girls who came to stay with me on the days my mom went for chemo.

On a happier note, Lori got the John Travolta issue of Rosie for me. That added sunshine here! Besides the bonus of Travolta, I love having magazines in english to read. When I get really homesick, I go out to Arlanda and get National Geographic and Reader’s Digest in english. A bonus of living so close to an international airport. *smile*

The kidlet is cantankerous, he won’t nap, refuses to bath, refuses to go out, spit out his lunch and is generally obnoxious. I need to have a shower and go to the store before school tonight. It will never get done if he doesn’t settle down. This is just a side effect of the night coughing/interrupted sleep. He is usually a ray of sunshine.

Well colour me jealous. Angela pointed out in her journal that John Travolta is on the cover of the most recent Rosie. John Travolta! Can you see the ghost of my teenage past peeking out here? I have loved him since the Welcome Back Kotter days. Blow Out is one of my all time favourite movies because of him. I want to hold this issue of Rosie in my hot little hands and swoon over Travolta. *laugh*

We have been busy as always. Thursday we went to öppna förskolan in the morning and then we got on a bus and went to Sigtuna. I have been wanting to go there for a long while now and since it was a fairly nice day, albeit darn windy, we made the trip. It is about a 20 minute bus ride so it isn’t really far. We went into all the little shops and the museum. We walked all about the touristy area on Storagatan. Much as I love sightseeing with my fellow, I find it more relaxing when it is the kidlet and I, at least in places like Sigtuna where my fellow gets bored of seeing the things he has seen all his life. The biggest find of the day was a used book store! As we were walking along I saw books outside on a table. One whole section of the table was english books at a price of 3 for 40 crowns. We went inside and I had to stop and just breathe in a few times. I have so missed the smell of used books stores. This the first one I have been in since we moved here. There was an entire section of books in english. I ended up with 6 paperbacks, all by favourite authors, for 95 crowns (about $9 US)Since a single paperback in english costs about $14 minimum, that was just so great.

Friday we had a quiet day, the kidlet was coughing and crabby. So we stayed home and played. My fellow brought home pizza for supper and we had just a nice relaxing evening.

Saturday we went to my fellows’ parents. I grocery shopped as well. We drove to Hässelby so I could clean but the group that was there for the day had not left yet, so we came back home. I know my fellow was really irked about that, but I had told him earlier in the week that I couldn’t clean Saturday. He made plans for friends of his to come and visit and rather than mention it to me when he was making those plans, he “remembered” there was “something about Saturday” so he invited them to come Sunday. The first I heard of it was Friday night when I pried out the information from him about whether or not he had plans for the weekend. Men! *laugh* I said I would get up early Sunday and go in but he pestered about taking me Saturday night until I finally agreed. So there was no sympathy from me for his ill humour at making the unproductive trip. *smile* The kidlet was up in the night with a cough, I tried honey in hot water to settle it but he coughed until he threw up and then finally settled. He was fine Sunday morning.

Sunday I got up early, cleaned and baked for our guests and kept the kidlet quiet so his dad could sleep. My fellow’s friends came about 2 pm. This was a high school friend of my fellow’s and his girlfriend. They live in Umeå and were here to visit on their trip home to Märsta last March. Nice couple. They were here for a few hours and then went back to his parents before they had to fly back up north. I made dinner here and after we ate my fellow drove me to work. I was quite prepared to go in myself but he insisted on taking me. He said if he didn’t someone might steal me and then who would make his breakfast in the morning. *laugh* Isn’t it great to be loved? *grin* While I cleaned, the guys played. It was funny to watch them. There is a big room with mirrors on one wall and a stereo system. The kidlet loves to have the music on and we can dance in front of the mirror. So he and his father played a similar game. They also played chase going in and out of the numerous doors in the room. It gave me time to clean without interruption and we were done in record time. (of course last week I spent an extra hour doing a really thorough scrubbing and wiping down of rads and pipes etc. so there was less to do this week) We were hom
e a little past 9 pm and got the kidlet settled in bed, then had tea with pumpkin gingerbread and banana muffins. The kidlet was up again with a cough in the night and crawled in with us. It didn’t last long though and he resettled.

Yesterday we spent part of the morning at öppna förskolan and then went to the post office to pick up a parcel. One of the women on a mailing list I am on (it is for older moms and a very small intimate group), sent a parcel. I knew she was sending me canned pumpkin but was not expecting a big box with 4 cans of pumpkin and a surprise for the kidlet. There was a beanie baby called “Bones” for him. He spied the ears as I was moving packing material and yelled “titta titta, Susan!!”. It does look a little like Susan actually, although the floppy ears are not curly like a cocker spaniel. There is a cocker spaniel beanie called Spunky that really does look like Susan. We bought it for my fellow’s sister in 1998 after she had been to Canada to visit up and fell in love with our Susan. That was pre kidlet of course and after he was born I looked for one for him but never saw another for sale. He does have one other, a cute horse called Derby. His own “Susan” was taken right into the bedroom and joined Winne, Piglet, Tigger and his 101 Dalmation dog, in his bed. When you add the three stuffed bears and the old stuffed dog that was his fathers’, it is getting kind of crowded in that little bed. When we went to bed last night his dad said we should soon extend the bed to the next size. No coughing at all last night and this morning we are watching kids movies (mom is limiting his computer time). I think we will do some painting later so he gets a break from the tv as well. I have a terrible headache this morning, the kind where even your teeth hurt. So I am not being really ambitious. I do have to make a trip to Arlanda this week though. I am hunting for a gift for my grandfather, I want a touristy book about Sweden with lots of pictures and english text. I haven’t seen one in any of the book stores around here, but thought maybe one of the shops at the airport might have something to fit the bill. Who knows, maybe one of them will even have that Rosie issue. *laugh*

I am 40% ADDICTED TO THE INTERNET.

I could go either way. Deep into the madness of nights filled with coding CGI-Scripts and online role playing games, or I could become a normal user.

My first attempt at pictures with the new camera are here. There are nine pictures of the kidlet on this page so it may load slow for some. This was our morning at öppna förskolan.

Am slowly catching up on the cleaning here. Things got out of hand while I was ill and with the kidlet being so clingy this past week I still have not gotten caught up. Last night after dinner I was baking muffins and washing dishes. My fellow asked me what I was doing and when I said dishes he asked why. I said because the cleaning fairy was not going to come do them and he said no kidding, but the filthing fairy sure has been around. I laughed at that and said he sure was right about that one, whereupon he informed me, with a laugh of his own, that I am silly. *laugh* Today I cleaned the fridge and straightened cupboards. Tomorrow is laundry day again. Saturday I washed all the throw rugs and scrubbed floors. I think by the end of the week I should be living in a neat home again at last. *smile* Soon it will be time to put up the christmas curtains and decorations. I want the apartment sparkling by then. *laugh*

Today we went to öppna förskolan. We haven’t been there since the 3rd and I went late on purpose. We got there at 1045 and by the time we were done singing at 1145, the kidlet was sobbing and inconsolable. I know it was that he was exhausted from all the hard playing he did and he is still a bit tired from the cold he was battling. I reminded him we were going to bake and that tonight I have school, so farmor was picking him up at 1700. That calmed him enough so he let go of me and I could put his snowsuit on. But every couple of minutes tears welled up in his eyes and he fought crying. We came home and I gave him lunch and after picking at it, he got up on the couch and under a blanket and is now sound asleep. I did the baking on my own. *smile*

I was addressing christmas postcards to send out at öppna förskolan. One of the women looked at my list and asked if I was sending to the whole of USA. I said yes and the whole of Canada too. *grin* By the time I get those and cards to family and friends sent out, it will add up to about 150 cards. Is that close to the entire population of North America? My bank account says yes. *smile*

I realized that I have been very depressed. Not sure how I missed the signs, but it was my fellows’ comment about wanting to see me happy that got me thinking about it. I have slacked off in cleaning up here daily, stopped dressing up and taken to wearing t shirt and slacks, stopped participating in mailing lists I have belonged to for years. Little things that I should have realized meant I was feeling low. So yesterday I had a shower in the afternoon when the kidlet was sleeping (he of course heard the water and had to come in with me *laugh*). I dressed up in a dress adding the jacket that I haven’t taken out of the closet in months and pretty stockings. I put on makeup, something I have not done for so long that I had a 30 minute hunt just to find where I had stashed it. I even got out my high heels and put them on to greet my fellow at the door. He was appreciative of the effort and we had a nice relaxing evening talking and watching tv. Even though I do get up every morning to make his breakfast, pack his lunch and see him off to work, I no longer was making a fuss when he came home. Will rectify that now. *smile*

When my fellow goes to work in the morning I always say “have a good day, love you, bye”. The kidlet has started saying “good day” after his hug and kiss and before his hej då. I think it is so funny. Last evening I went to the store and I took the kidlet along. As were going out into the dark, he turned back and said “a good day” to his father. I guess I should teach him the difference between day and night, but we are still working on which is in and which is out, so it will have to wait. *smile*

Enough babbling, I have some dishes to wash and then need to get organized for swedish class tonight. Have a good day! Hej då.

I sometimes forget just how sweet my fellow can be. Yesterday we became the owners of a digital camera and personal picture maker. My 35 mm camera broke a year or so ago and at that time we half heartedly looked at digitals as a replacement. Since then I have used disposable cameras for any picture taking I needed to do. A few days ago he asked if I would like a digital camera, just out of the blue and now it is here. I asked what prompted this purchase and he told me he got it because he wanted to see me happy. I guess I have not been a real ray of sunshine here lately with all the sad things in my life. I told him I love having the camera, but he didn’t have to buy things to make me happy. His reply was “And now you tell me that!!”. *laugh* Now I need to learn to use this and then I can get around to finally completing the update of my personal website and start adding recent pictures.

Saturday we slept in, did laundry and attempted to change to snow tires on the car. The tire changing was attempted at my fellows’ parents place but was put on hold when the socket broke. Did lots of cleaning as well.

Sunday we were up early since my fellow had to work. I am not used to him working so much overtime but things are really busy at work at the moment. The kidlet and I went into Stockholm to my job. We made a day of it and I took him for lunch. My fellow picked us up after he was done work and we went to his parents for dinner, since it was Father’s Day.

Kidlet still has his cough and the occasional low grade fever. All the action on Sunday prompted a bit of a relapse Monday, but he is much better today. We are just setting off to do some grocery shopping.

We have Windows XP on the new computer and we set up an account for the kidlet. He knows how to log in and we put shortcuts on the desktop for him, to his favourite games. I find it so funny seeing a 3 year old be this computer savvy. When I was pregnant my dad used to say if we had a girl she should be called Nettie (from Internet) and a boy should be called Cy (from cyber). He called the kidlet the “Internet baby” since his father and I met online. These days, the kidlet really is an “Internet baby”. *laugh* Sunday he came to me with a flyer from an electronics store and showed me a computer that he wanted his father to buy for him. I guess the days of him being content to bang away on the old Vic 80 are long past now. *grin*

Wow, it is Tuesday already. About time I updated. *laugh*

Friday I was domestic and did all the housework stuff that had piled up while I was ill. Then I cooked a roast beef and made my brothers’ famous “Roasted Potatoes”. We had a fresh salad and cauliflower with it. We had a quiet home evening.

Saturday we slept in, I had a parcel at the post office and had planned on mailing some postcards off, but it was a red day (stat holiday, All Saints Day) so the post office was closed. We packed up some clothes, put the roll away cot in the trunk and went off to Månkarbo. I had made Pumpkin Gingerbread to take out with us. This making things from scratch, as in baking a whole pumpkin to get the equivalent of two cans of pumpkin, is a bit of a pain. *laugh* It was a hit though, so that made it well worth the work. Besides I got to do roasted pumpkin seeds for us to munch on as well.

It was great fun at the cottage. We had fika when we arrived (coffee and cake) and then visited for a bit. Then we all settled in with books and crossword puzzles and relaxed. Dinner was easy. We had crayfish, potato salad, fresh bread and a variety of cheeses for the bread. I really love crayfish but I don’t get much since the kidlet loves it just as much and I spend an inordinate amount of time fishing the meat out of the shell for him. *smile* We relaxed again after dinner, had another fika about 8 pm and then settled the kidlet to bed. Once he was in bed I finally braved the dark and cold to go to the outhouse. The only downside of the cottage. *grin* They plan on turning one of the outbuildings into a sauna, shower and indoor bathroom in the spring. Still a trip out of the cottage but a much nicer environment.

We watched a movie that my fellows’ sister called and asked him to rent. It was call “What Women Want” (I think that is the english title) and it was rather funny. Then we settled into bed. We got the bunk beds, the kidlet was on an air mattress on the floor. In the middle of the night he rolled off and under the bed, then got scared. So he crawled in with me and I spent the remainder of the night getting kicked and poked as he tossed and turned.

Sunday we slept late as well. The kidlet was up early but played quietly until his grandparents got up. Farfar made an egyptian dish for breakfast. It had tomatoes, eggs and some kind of beans and was eaten on paper thin bread. My fellow says they are called “fool” beans but I have my doubts that is the spelling of it. We cleaned up and then headed out. The kidlet stayed with his grandparents, we took their daughter with us. When we dropped her off and went home, I packed a book in my purse and headed for work. My fellow picked me up about 7 pm. When I called to see where he was, I could hear the kidlet talking and laughing. I could not figure out who he was talking to. The mystery was solved when they arrived. Farmor and farfar bought the kidlet a toy parrot that repeats everything he says. As if he didn’t talk enough before. *laugh* Apparently he had a heated argument with the bird … kidlet: “min pappa” bird: “min pappa” kidlet: “nej, min pappa!” bird: “nej, min pappa!” and on it went. *laugh* I guess it was payback for us taking his harmonica to the cottage. We went to Max for dinner. They are a much nicer alternative than McDonalds.

Sunday night I phoned home. I called my sister and she broke the news that my Aunt J. is not going to get better. I was not surprised at all since Aunt M. has kept me updated and 20 years as a nurse means I can pretty much fill in the blanks. I feel so sad about this. We grew up a few houses away from my aunt, uncle and cousin. We were always close. When I was home in April, she was a happy vital woman. Working, running errands for everyone and looking like a million. Now she is in hospital, on morphine, weighing under 90 lbs. It is hard for me to fathom this. It is even harder for my grandparents who have already lost 2 children to cancer. This has been a tough year for them. Each has lost a sister in law. My dad (t
heir son in law) died in May. My uncle (their baby and only son) died in August. Now their eldest child is dying as well. When I phoned them on Sunday they both cried on the phone. My gram still cries every time I call but grandpa rarely does, so it is really hard to hear. I also called and spoke with Aunt J. I haven’t called her at the hospital but my sister told me that my cousin had brought her home for the day so I called there. When I spoke to her I knew. She sounded like my dad did those last couple of weeks before he died. I feel like I should go home, but then I think I am probably better to stay put and remember her as she was when I saw her 6 months ago.

Monday my fellow was off work, since he had been on call the previous week. We slept till almost 8:30 and then I took the kidlet to playgroup. They had a photographer there doing pictures. Afterwords we had breakfast and then went shopping. I bought some little things to wrap and send for my nieces and nephews and something for my grandma. So there are only a couple gifts left to buy for Canada. We picked up my parcel, which was 7 issues of Smithsonian magazine that a fellow here in Sweden was passing along to me. We came home and had a late lunch about 3:30. The kidlet was brutal because he was so tired. So we went for a nap about 4 pm and he slept straight through until 7 this morning. I slept until Aunt M. called and then I did sushi and pad thai for dinner. There had been a big letter from Aunt M. earlier in the day and I was actually going to phone her. She sent a copy of the eulogy that my brother wrote for my uncles funeral, a card full of hugs and kisses for the kidlet and a father’s day card for my fellow to open on Sunday (which is father’s day here in Sweden). We had a great chat and as always it was nice to hear from her.

Today has been quiet so far. Kidlet has a bit of a cold so we did not go to playgroup. Instead we took the dog for a long walk after our showers. I think this afternoon we are going to sort through the stamps I picked up at the flea market Sunday.